These furnitures are grotesque. I see them around all day along. They never change, they irritate. They have no use. Those wardrobes offer me no clothes to wear; No reason to dress up, No reason to look anyhow; Yet they lock up clothes of no usage. Those chairs are spiteful; No one sits in them, And call no one to sit; Yet they are so many. Those tables are horrid; Half empty-half stucked, And the whole thing is for usage; Yet they don’t make me to put on them anything. Those shelves are judging; Holding those read and unread books, And the thick dust on them all around; Yet there’s no reason to approach the whole. The desk, with the no use computer – The stove, with the cold cole in it – The cupboard with glasses filled with air – The fridge that doesn’t open randomly anymore – The carpet that detests the steps on it – The mass grave of bathroom cabinets – The insignificant pictures on the wall – The wooden ceiling that just covers them all, and this bed I am lying in with no use Are just grotesque.
When you are not needed, You just make up things, When you are not needed, Things fulfill your days, When you are not needed, Dreams are just some things, When you are not needed, Things are just distractions, When you are not needed, Goals are just made up things, When you are not needed, Things are just frustrations, When you are not needed, Nights reaveal there are no things, When you are not needed, Things just fall apart, When you are not needed, You just wait the end of made up things.
You who can’t hear the scream of silence; The shrieking loneliness of days and nights, You who can’t see the shades of indifference; The invisible sadness in the ever smiling eyes, You who can’t touch life in ceaseless roughness; The dried out face that only in the heart cries, You who can’t taste the rejoice as bitterness; The rockbottoms of an endless precipice, You who can’t feel the lifelong unpeace; The homelessness in roof disguise, How could you understand the words of mine’s; The life inside a violin’s fall and rise, How could you understand Peace; A moment my heart so eagerly desires, Being absent on me in the whiles.
How I envy you all Who can just ignore me, Delete me from sites or apps, Block my number and WhatsApp, And see my face on Facebook no more While I am glued, imprisoned with myself; Not like you, I need to face me daily – again And again feeling pity, disgust, nuisance, hate, And weirdness, waiting eagerly my disappearance.
Don’t cry my dear mother, Not even your love was enough to bright the world, Don’t cry my lil brother, I’m with you even from underworld, Don’t cry my loved exes, I’m in the place you wished me by your last word, Don’t cry my cold lover, There are fuckboys needing no emotional support, Don’t cry my classmates, colleagues, My place will provide others even better comfort, Don’t cry my greedy father, Money will come from other mysterious sort, Don’t cry my dear friends, This is my last silent detachment I created, Don’t cry my employers, There will be other slaves better graduated, Don’t cry my world, I am leaving a place that I always hated.